I was given an incredible gift a couple of weeks ago. Scott handed me a box, wrapped beautifully in colorful paper. It wasn’t my birthday or any special occasion, but Scott has always been impulsive about gifts, which is one of the things I love about him. I had no idea what might be inside.
Anyone with dreams and pursuits in the arts, and I know that’s pretty much everyone who ever reads or comments here knows that it comes with such a mixed bag of feelings: hope, despair, optimism, pessimism, loneliness, isolation, small victories, major self-doubt and for many years, I didn’t jump into my dream of writing fully. There were lots of reasons.
Since I’ve committed to this path, the biggest single strength I have outside of myself is Scott and the support that he gives me. Writing is so intensely personal and private that I don't share it with very many people; wouldn't be sharing it with a critique group now if Scott had not encouraged me to go to a retreat and sign up for a workshop. Since he’s an artist and has been for many years, there is no emotion I’ve felt that he’s not familiar with. I never realized how important having someone to support my dreams and my work would be to me, but it is.
This was what was in the box and it hangs on the wall in front of my desk. If I were to someday win the Pulitzer, it wouldn't mean more than this does.
His love and support allow me to follow my dream in a way I've never been able to consider in previous chapters of my life and after so many years of false starts and blind alleys, I'm so grateful to have found someone who is following his dream and wants to see me follow mine. The way he's led his life is an inspiration to me and his encouragement means everything.
How important is the support of your spouse, lover, friends, and/or relatives to your journey?
17 comments:
I am so touched by this lovely gesture. I would answer your question about my own support system, but I'm all choked up over here.
Let's just say it is the most important thing. I don't think my friends truly understand the level of commitment needed to be a writer or an author, but my family does and my husband does and that's enough for me.
I remember how my ex laughed at me once because I only made 13 dollars from writing one year. She commented on how she'd made more money selling one lipstick gloss on her Mary Kay account.
Lana is a far cry from that, much more like your Scott. Wonderfully supportive and helpful. I appreciate her every day. Scott sounds like a very nice guy.
lisa,
what beautiful acknowledgment!
What a wonderful gesture on his part and a lovely recognition of it on yours. Thanks for stopping by my blog.
How sweet! You've got a keeper there, but you already know that.
It means everything to have a husband who supports my creative work, and to have good friends who do as well.
Thank God also for the internets.
Having had the pleasure of communicating with Scott (regarding another surprise for you, Lisa), I know he's a true gentleman -- delightful and genuine. He's one of those individuals who cares and shares in the happiness in others, however I don't necessarily think you're "lucky." Instead, it's all about like attracting like...you were made for each other!
no can inspire me like husband. he reads every word i write...tells me with authority that i have talent...tells me that i can do this...
have i mentioned he is brilliant and is almost...almost... always right?
Kristen, I've read enough of your posts to know that you've got enormous support with your husband and with your family. It's almost impossible to do this without that, isn't it?
Charles, That's such an extreme example of how hard life is without support, but I can relate. Lana sounds wonderful and you've given me a visual of her popping in to root you on when you're working. We are lucky people.
Olufunke, He is wonderful :)
Anti-Wife, You've got a great blog and I plan to stop by regularly!
Carleen, Having the main person in our lives and then friends on top of that -- life has taken a wonderful turn over the years. And the internet -- wow, I've "met" so many people who sometimes seem to know me better than those who've known me for years -- and when it comes to writing, they do.
Larramie, All I can say is I never imagined someone like him existed and now I can hardly remember what it was like without him.
Patti, I know exactly what you mean!
Hi Lisa--Since you've commented on my blog a couple of times, I hopped over to check yours out. I read the recent entries with great pleasure. Scott sounds like the perfect support system--not only interested and supportive of your ambitions, but also understanding your creative drives. I appreciate your openness and self-disclosure in your entries. You ARE a writer and your agonies illustrate the creative process well. Thanks. I intend to read your blog regularly, and have added it to the links list on my blog.
P.S. I checked out Scott's website too, and I love his work. His style is impressionistic, which I love, and have a quality of light that reminds me of some of the Dutch Masters.
Sphinx, I've "lurked" around your blog for quite a while before commenting and I've enjoyed all of your posts. Thank you for the kind comments and your encouragement. Posting about this journey has been very helpful to me and I've learned so much from other bloggers and through the process of putting my thoughts about what I'm doing into words. I'll also thank you on Scott's behalf as he will appreciate your comments on his work. So glad that you stopped by!
Please tell Scott I love "Sunset Perthshire." I'm enjoying the paintings of his you decorate your blog with.
How wonderful for you to have such good support! I, too, am blessed with a husband who believes in me, but I have friends who do not have a good support system—and some friends whose loved ones actively undermine their confidence and invade their writing time. Writing is hard enough even with support; I can't imagine how unpleasant life is when the people close to you have no respect for your dreams.
It's a reminder that we writers should boost each other up, because not everyone has a Scott or a Dave (my husband).
Simply put, I couldn't do what I do, they way I do, without the love and support of my husband. I trust his ear and his perspective--and his pride in what I've accomplished and what I might in the future helps me to trust in myself.
We're lucky, aren't we Lisa?
Beautiful :-)
I couldn't do what I'm doing without my dh's support and total belief.
How lucky you are. In my pre-pub days, my ex-husband constantly made slurring references to my "bullshit books" that no one was ever going to buy. One of the reasons he's now my EX-husband!
Wow. I see a mutual admiration here that will carry you both through a long, forevermore partnership.
susan @ Spinning
Shauna, I will let him know -- he always likes to hear it. I understand very well what it's like to have a spouse actively undermining your dreams. It's easier to be single than to be with someone who doesn't want you to reach your highest potential. I'm so glad the "blogosphere" exists so that everyone has the opportunity to connect with a supportive group.
Judy and Liz, It is so true. This is such an obsession that without the right partner, either the marriage or the writing has to go. It took me a long time to find the right person and now it's like I can finally be who I am.
Candice, I wasn't always so lucky and I can relate. I spent my 30s with someone who didn't want me to go back to school, write, get promoted at work or have outside interests. I can't believe I lived like that. And you! Look at you now! How many books have you published...is it a dozen?!
It is a gift to share a life so completely, isn't it?
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